...

I love the internet but I've struggled to engage with most social media because I simultaneously struggle to use it and view it as below me. I've never seen the point in telling people I don't like, or people I don't know, about things I'm doing. It's hard to see most things I do as interesting at all as well or if they are interesting, I'm not taking my phone out to distract myself from it to document it. When short form content gain popularity or rather was forced upon places we are all the time, I really did try to abstain. However it's so impossible to avoid I've installed extenstions to block them on YouTube and use a hacked client to remove all posts, reels, the whole feed from Instagram. So, now it's just a messenger to me so i don't have to make everyone change their addictions to suit me.

It's interesting that I have these feelings about the interent and yet I'm hopelessly addicted to cigarettes.

I have eradicated social media adiction, and decreased my phone use tonnes but yet i still spend most of my time on YouTube on my laptop. I love learning. I just spend hours watching video essay after video essay but it is a problem. I need to comsume less so I can create more. I'm making an album at the moment and to promote it, I'm gonna start a YoutUbe channel that will be referencial to the music as advertisement but mostly a place for video essays and whatever short films I've made. So cigarettes are staying for now, although I did just try to quit, but I need to spend more time creating and less time comsuming so i can actually get it done in a timeley manner.

I've almost finished a song that i've been trying to record for half a decade, jesus christ. I'm using like edm drums and it works but I've moved to a Nirvana guitar tone so the song sounds Dave Rogers esc, but more "serious"? Idk the correct word to use. Gritty? Dark? Dim? Who cares. We'll see how it goes.

Time Spent Online has been an extremely interesting read and quite useful to me. This is sad to admit, but i literally don't know what to do without a screen. I just sit there or go one a walk or something. I used to draw, I used to write, I used to make comics. Now I just exist most the time. A sponge to information. I grew up with screens. DS, Xbox 360, the PC, a phone, a tablet. It's slowly took over most of my life to the point where it's a problem and now I'm trying to decrease my useage, i need to relearn what to do with my time. So music. My greatest passion. My guiar, my bass, and the notes app.